More and more I have come to realize that my primary life goal these days is to have fun.
This is quite the predicament, because I live in Germany, where Fleiß and being ernst are key personality traits of every Deutsche I've ever met, except Heinie's Onkel Norbert, God bless 'im. And though it is home to the largest party in the world -- the annual Oktoberfest -- and many MANY a festival, I still don't find Germany to be a very amusing place, people-wise anyway. .
Take for example those big bawdy beer halls full of red-cheeked strangers singing in unison and clinking their glasses together. They might be appealing, but because I'm not German and have to find my way home at the end of the night, I can't enjoy more than one or two beers. I won't fit in unless I want to become a drunkard, and my drinking days are mostly fertig.
I just want to be happy, and fun makes me feel good. Unfortunately, I'm in a place where fun isn't a primary life goal.
Do I sound shallow and immature? Oh yes, I've been told by Heinie, currently the least fun person I know because we broke up, that I'm kindisch. That doesn't bother me so much, because I am immature in many ways -- I admit it! I'm not an old soul like some of my friends and acquaintances. I'm a young soul who has lots to learn.
In my younger days in fact, I lived for learning. I loved it. I sought out knowledge whenever and wherever I could, often by asking strangers about what they were doing, why they did it, what they created, where they learned what they knew, when their activity first appeared in history, from what part of the world it originated, etc. I'm afraid to ask too much here, because it is not an accepted norm to be curious, inquisitive and sometimes obnoxious, as we Americans can be. Germans keep to themselves and don't open up too much on the first try. It takes years to crack some of their shells.
It still stimulates me to gain knowledge about something that interests or challenges, but it's not my favorite thing to do anymore. There is much to learn, but I have given up in the last few years, partly because the curious events in my life and in this world are so surprising and unfathomable that I can't comprehend a lot of what's going on. There is no explanation for much of it, especially recently since a certain orange-faced swindler and his band of bandits took office -- no rhyme or reason, no purpose, no meaning, no answers.
I lived for partying, going out with friends, drinking and smoking all night while laughing and expending all the stresses gained during the week.
Never have I lived for work, although my jobs have been very rewarding, and I'm currently in a good space.
Decorating my apartment can be entertaining, but nothing to laugh about.
Nope, I realize I love fun. I love to laugh and play, and it's about all I want to do these days, because I never get to. Absence (of fun) makes the heart grow fonder!
Not to be too exclusive, but every sibling of mine is the same way -- we have fun. When we go out to restaurants, we're the loudest in the place, laughing and joking, telling stories. At family parties, we have a really good time. My family is many kilometers away, and I only see them once a year. That really dampens the general enjoyment of my daily life, so one can understand I need to make up in the fun department.
The best fun I have is usually with people who really get me, and who I get, sometimes over a coffee and a piece of cake, or an alcoholic beverage. There is lots and lots of laughter, and the enjoyment comes as a big surprise. Now that's fun.
IF YOU'RE GERMAN: The following link will take you to an article about how to enjoy life more. Read it -- you all need to lighten up! https://www.selbstbewusstsein-staerken.net/spass-am-leben/
Wörterbuch / Dictionary
ernst - serious, solemn, stern (and all of those horrible things)
fertig - finished
(der) Fleiß - industriousness, diligence
kindisch - childish, immature
